Giving a Hand

Have you ever tried to help someone out of the goodness of your heart and found later that you have fallen in the pit with him or her? Have you tried to give a person a hand whom you think is in a pit and found out that actually the very same person had pulled you inside the pit? And now you are struggling to come out yourself? Help!.. Help!!.. there isn’t anyone to help you. Now it becomes your job to come out.

I have experienced this a few times, where I have tried to help some one come of the tunnel but the very same had pulled me inside.

I am learning to use caution with people I am trying to help. First of all, if a person does not want be helped you really cant help them. Some people become very comfortable living in side the pit or the tunnel. It becomes their comfort zone. And they don’t make any attempts to come out simply because they love it there. You may not see it, but they are there, because most of them want to. They have no intensions of moving out even if there is plenty of help.

If you are in the helping field like I am, we must exercise caution. It’s a noble thing to help others and as humans we must. However, we must also understand the powers we have and we don’t have. A person must open his or her heart to be helped, if they don’t, unfortunately no matter how much we love them or care for them, we cant do much. We surely can pray, and ask God to make an intervention but we can not help them if they don’t want to be helped. Sure! This is not easy, because we want our loved ones to be safe and happy but we must also understand that just because we love or care for a person we cant make the wrong right. We must also be cautious not to fall in the pit. As I mentioned earlier, I have experienced this a few times in my life, where I have tried to pull someone out of the pit and instead, they have pulled me inside. And then, it’s hard for me to come back up, the person inside with me has no interest in coming up, in fact, the person has gotten so comfortable inside that he/she has made a home there, and they are actually happy there, singing their own blue songs, and throwing pity parties, and they are not even missing the sunshine.

This can happen to the best of us. So lets be careful. Of course, we must help others around us, give a person a hand and try to get them back on track, we are trying to do this while we are also struggling to stay on track. But for some reason if the person does not want to come out, then we must pray for them and move on. Make genuine efforts, but know your limits and boundaries. Know what you can and cannot do for a person. Let them know if they need help you are there to help. Getting ourselves burnt is not right. We are individually responsible for our own lives. Staying on track and coming out of the tunnel is our responsibility too. At the end of the day, we are responsible and accountable for us.

In your attempt to help another, do you notice yourself falling in the pit? Please dont.. use caution.